Yaaaay! I’ve Done It!

Yaaaaaay! I’ve done it! I have RETIRED!!! This is my first blog in ages and the first of, I hope, many, charting the ups and downs of this new period in my life. It was a huge decision which was partly forced upon me but which I had been toying with for some time.

The beginning of the year was extremely stressful, mainly work related, with a couple of more personal issues thrown in for good measure. And to top it all my blog site suffered a fatal crash. All these stressors have plunged me into an abyss of poor motivation and lack of interest in pursuing my interests. I have taken or edited very few photos, my blogging mojo died and we have hardly been away, one holiday and a few weekends is all we’ve done. All I wanted to do was go to sleep until it was all over. Which is a shame when, despite everything that has happened, I have so many good things both to remember and look forward to. Work was my biggest issue. I have been a nurse for nigh on 30 years and have always been proud of my nursing achievements. But this last year has been pure hell. Six years ago I took my NHS pension and returned to the private care sector. Not really a good move but at least I was working locally. My final workplace was, for the first year, a really nice place to work, but with changes of management and policies my job, and that of my nursing colleagues, became fraught with fear and worry. Around this time I was beginning to resent having to go to work and fitting all the things I wanted to do into my days off or meagre annual leave. A further irritation came when my sister, four years my junior, retired on her birthday and here was I, still plodding along and feeling like there was no end in sight. I kept telling myself  “one more year” so we’d be better off, and I would have been nursing for 30 years, which I convinced myself was an achievement in itself. However, this attitude took it’s toll, I found myself not as caring or patient as I should be, I became cynical, especially regarding the motives of my manager. The company I worked for prefer to punish and make examples of their staff rather than trying to address any problems created by their management style. Unfortunately myself and several others were swept up in what I can only see as a huge “saving the managements asses” program. We were threatened with disciplinary actions and dismissals to the point that I decided enough was enough. As the mortgage was paid off and our debts were reducing nicely, I decided I really couldn’t face working any longer in a service run by inept and inadequate managers. That, and summer was fast approaching. So, after a period of sickness, during which we worked out our finances, I finally handed my notice in and became a fully fledged retiree. Work colleagues told me I’d be bored, miss the hustle and bustle, want to return to work. None of this has happened but neither was I filling my time with all those things I always said I’d be able to do once I had the time. Initially I went through a period of not really doing anything, sleeping in late, mooching around the house in my pyjamas, watching box sets on Netflix and Amazon Prime, playing games on my iPad, going to bed at two in the morning, All of which Paul says is normal for a newly retired person. It is now time to leave the resentment and anger at the way I was forced to retire behind, be thankful for a wonderful family and move on, get motivated, live retired life to the full.